14 Weeks!!

This is getting exciting as we slowly approach the twenty weeks mark. After my m/c I never thought ahead to 14 weeks. I took one week at a time, hoping I would get there. This is changing now. In my heart I know that I will hold my baby in my arms at the end of October or the beginning of November, so I look into the future with a smile. I can see the end of May/beginning of June coming, and guess what will happen then? …. That’s right – gender u/s !!! hah! I can’t wait.

Not much has been going on within the last week. I’ve stressed myself out regarding the course I’m taking at college. Okay, this is going to be a really hilarious story, and I laughed so hard at myself yesterday, so you better lean back and enjoy the ride.

DH never really believed in what I called “pregnancy brain” as many women online would call it. It’s basically the hormones messing with your braincells – for real! After a few weeks of being pregnant, DH suddenly adapted really quickly to the idea of “pregnancy brain” and began calling me PB for just about anything and everything I do. Within the last couple of weeks I can truly say PB has been settling in more than I like! So here’s the deal: We had our first paper due just before spring-break (in March). To get an A on the paper we needed to write at least 2500-5000 words. If we were okay with a B we could leave it at 1500-2500 words. Those of you who know me will realize that I would never settle for a B, haha! So I turned in my paper, and wrote in my “one-page per class journal” which we had to submit during each class that I’m so amazed and happy I actually made it over the 2500 limit, because I never thought I’d get it done in time. (If you ever took that class at CCCC you’ll know why I say that lol). I wrote 2667 words (that’s what I had counted before turning in the paper). Well, a few weeks after spring break I suddenly got nervous… and when we had peer review (April 10) I said to my peer: omg I just realized I never wrote enough for an A! I only got a little over 1500 words! So I stressed myself out for weeks, because I knew I wouldn’t have the time and energy to write another 1000 words! (our professor would let us do that). Every class I hoped we’d get our paper back, so I could work on it if I had to. The week we were finally supposed to get it back – well… we didn’t. We had to wait yet another week. So yesterday we finally got our paper back. I was hoping the professor might not have noticed that my paper was short 1000 words and was so dazzled by my content that he would give me an A anyway! Sure enough, I had an A on my paper… and he’d written: “long paper” on it. I was like huh? Long paper? Really? No way… I told my friend, you know, my paper isn’t even minimum words… I could so not believe this, so when I got home, I counted the words again! Sure enough, I had over 2600 without quotes, over 3000 with quotes. Wow! I double checked my journal entry, cuz I knew I had the word count written in there originally. I could have sworn it said 1667, but it actually said 2667. I told DH when he got home, and he cracked up. So did I. Seriously, where has my brain gone? My little bean stole it… it’s hilarious.

And that’s not the only thing… A week or so ago, I was putting the milk back in the morning, but instead of going to the fridge with it, I went to the cabinet where I got my cup from… Yes, keep laughing, it gets better… A few days ago I was doing laundry. There is a button on our washer that turns the washer on, and then there is a seperate button that starts the washer after you’ve turned it on and programmed it. So last time I did laundry, I kept hitting the button trying to turn the washer on… but it wouldn’t come on! I was like, what the hell is going on? I kept hitting it and hitting it – nothing! Well… then I realized I was hitting the start button all along, instead of the power button. Duh! That was the first time ever lol! I really have lost my brain thanks to the PB-“condition”.

Okay, enough with the laughing 🙂 yea yea, I know, you probably want to hear more of this hilarious stuff! I’ll tell you more, when/if I do more of these silly things. I really hope I’ll get my brain back lol

Let’s look at this week’s pregnancy symptoms.

Morning sickness: Definitely on its way out. I think come next week it may be completely gone, yay.

Weight gain: I’ve been mostly in the 150 pounds range this week, but bouncing a bit between 149 and 151. Overall average weight gain: 5 pounds.

Pains: I’ve been feeling some more ligament pain again this week. And I can totally tell when the uterus is expanding – I do get slight cramps that are not painful, just feel like a stretch. I know what’s going on then. Kind of liking that…

Fatigue: God, I’ve been tired recently. Starting around 2-3 pm I tend to need a nap for like an hour. Most women get fatigued during their first trimester and regain their energy during the second… I seem to be the other way around. My body is so out of norm in so many aspects.

Frequent urination: This seems to be switching back to daytimes again. I seem to need to get up and go less during the nights now, and more during the day again.

Other symptoms: I’ve been experiencing some dizziness recently. Nothing too wild. I’m prone to dizziness and fainting even when I’m not pregnant, cuz my circulation isn’t the strongest. (and no, it has not much to do with drinking more or less in my case). They say it’s normal during pregnancy… it has something to do with the blood, I can’t exactly remember. They advise, among other things, to get up from a lying or sitting position slowly. Yup, I noticed getting up quick  gets me more dizziness. I’ve also had some more heartburn, and I’ve noticed that my gums are a little more sensitive. They tend to bleed faster.

Last weekend we bought some maternity pants for me, since my regular pants are getting tight and uncomfortable to wear. I never knew what maternity pants look like or how they work, and I have to say I’m positively surprised. I love them. No more zipper and buttons, just a comfortable “pull-up,” and a nice elastic band goes over your belly. And let me tell you, that belly is starting to look like it’s carrying a baby! But it appears that it’s not only my body looking different. A student I’d helped in the last semester came in on Monday. She knew I’d been pregnant last semester and lost the baby. So she came in, looked at me and descretely asked: “Are you pregnant again?” When I said yes, she said: “I knew it, you have that glow.”  … what do you know? I have the glow! Sweet 🙂

There’s one more thing I’d like to mention. Last Wednesday, after publishing my weekly blog post, I went to campus, and as I walked up the stairs, going to the Reading/Writing Resource Center, I felt something peculiar in my lower abdomen. I figured it may have been digestion, or gas moving around, but it felt slightly different than that. In fact, it felt just like my mom had described kicks to me: As if someone is knocking against your belly from the inside. … And it came from the area we had heard the kicks on the doppler the day before. How amazing! Now it may or may not have been a kick – who knows. I’d like to believe it was. However, I haven’t felt it since, so it was probably something else. I so can’t wait to feel my baby’s activities!

Thanks for reading. See you next week!


13 weeks–baby alive and kickin’ — literally!

Wohooooo- yea. 13 weeks! This is getting better and better. I feel a lot more confident compared to when I first found out I was pregnant again. Not too many chances now of something really bad happening. Yes, the chance of m/c is always there, but it’s significantly lower now, and I feel so much better knowing that and being there – at 13 weeks.

So what’s been going on this past week? Hmmm… let’s see. Saturday we were at one of our German-American Club events and I wore my black maternity dress for the first time. Pretty much everyone there knew I’d been pregnant back in October. Some of them knew I miscarried, and only a couple knew I was pregnant again. So when the event was over and we helped clean up, one of the ladies came to me and said: “Are you pregnant again?” And I looked at her with a smile and answered: “Yes.” And then she said: “I thought so. Because you usually have a flat belly.” … wow, you can’t believe how good that felt haha. (even though I normally wear a corset, which makes my fat disappear a little when I’m not pregnant) Still, I do begin to show a little baby-bump as my organs are being pushed around to make room for our little one. I can’t wait to be carrying a proud big baby belly! 🙂

There will be photos of the event and of me in the dress down below, as well as the promised PAX East photos.

Yesterday was the main event of the week. I had my next midwife appointment. We talked a lot about nutrition, which is important to both myself and her. She tested my blood pressure and urine – all checked out great. And then of course we tried to find baby’s heart beat on the doppler again. Three-four weeks ago we’d been unable to find it. Today, we did find it! Yay! That quick wush wush wush sound was the most amazing sound I’ve ever heard in my life. Baby’s heart rate was 153 bpm, which is great! When DH got home we listened to it again and the heart rate was 156 bpm – baby must have gotten excited haha – or mad at us for bothering him/her again 😀
But here is the best part of it: before DH came home, we were also able to hear another amazing sound while listening to the heart beat– kicks! We heard two kicks on the doppler. When I heard that sound, my midwife said: that’s a kick. I was totally overwhelmed. It was the cutest thing ever. After the second kick baby went into hiding. We couldn’t find the heart beat any longer. That’s why I said earlier he or she may be mad at us for bothering him or her haha. I think the kicks were a way of saying: leave me alone, I’m snoozing here! When DH got home we found the heart beat again, but soon afterwards it went into hiding again. What a sweet little baby!

Progesterone – I did stop taking the gel last Thursday. I was terrified! I checked every wipe more closely than usual. Checking my wipes has almost become a habit by now, but since I stopped with the gel I got really obsessed with it. After about three or four days went by and I didn’t see any blood whatsoever on my wipes, I began feeling much better about it. And of course after yesterday I feel perfectly good about having stopped taking prog supps.

Those were this week’s highlights, so let’s look at good old preggo symptoms:

Morning sickness: ugh, it’s still there. Often when I’m very hungry. But I think it may be slowly on its way out.

Frequent urination: I’ve been spared a little bit this week. Haven’t had the nasty urge I had last week. I think baby is done pressing on my bladder haha. This past night was the first night in a while I did not need to get up to pee–which I find quite amazing considering yesterday was the first day in weeks I actually managed to drink 70 fl oz of water!

Weight gain: Well, we pigged out a little bit this week–with the event and some laziness and leftovers, such as cake. I’ve been bouncing around between 147 pounds and 150 pounds. This morning I had 152 pounds! wow! Just like that one week when I’d suddenly gained 2 pounds more overnight. I think that will go away within the next couple days. Overall, I’d say I gained an average of 4 pounds so far.

Headaches: I’ve been getting headaches recently. I could find all sorts of reasons for them, but at some point I run out of excuses. I generally get headaches with quick weather changes (sometimes), if I sleep too long (nearly every time) or if I’m too warm in bed during the night, and of course I can get a headache if I don’t drink enough (though that rarely happens to me, oddly enough). I’m slowly unable to match those excuses to what is actually going on. Weather change – okay, could be. Definitely haven’t slept longer than usual, and my drinking patterns haven’t really changed. So it must be hormones. Of course my midwife advised me to drink more – and I have to, I know that. Why is this so hard? Sunday morning I woke up so thirsty. I went to the office, grabbed my water bottle and emptied what was left in it. I went in the kitchen to put the empty bottle away, taking a deep breath after drinking, and DH asks if something is wrong, cuz I was sighing. I told him I wasn’t sighing, just catching my breath after drinking. I actually felt thirsty! I hardly ever feel thirsty – feels so good! (Now, how many people would say that? haha). I want to be thirsty more often! Come on!

Other symptoms: Sometimes I find it actually difficult to figure out if what I’m feeling is hunger, being full, or heartburn. I’m pretty sure there’s been some more heartburn though, not much. I’ve been noticing that I’m getting more break-outs on my skin these days, especially between my breasts (which are still sensitive by the way). I’m slowly getting the feeling this may actually be a girl. Would be so awesome!

Well, this is all for this week. Stop by again next week 🙂

All right, here are the promised pictures, enjoy.
(click to enlarge)

Pax East 2012

At the Pax East in front of a giant D&D monster 🙂

Pax East 2012

At Pax East, overlooking the huge convention hall

Pax East 2012

At Pax East, playing (learning to play) D&D

German-American Club of Cape Cod

This was our April event at the club. It was a potluck.


This is my new maternity dress, which I wore at the event 🙂 -- obviously this was taken after the event

Maternity dress

Okay, a side view. I look huge in that dress because I stuffed my belly that night, all right? lol

12 Weeks – let’s dance!

I like the sound of that.

12 weeks.

wow. We’re really there. We’ve made it. The most critical part of the pregnancy is over. The first trimester is completed. After miscarrying you lose the naivety you had when you first started. All of a sudden everything looks dangerous to you. All of a sudden you notice every little thing your body does a lot more. You are more aware of your body, and it is scary, because the smallest change that you’re not used to rings your alarms. The worry goes up 100%. Now it can finally come down 50%. It will never go back to 0 after having miscarried before.

So let’s reflect what happened during the past week.

Last Saturday, April 7th, was our anniversary! We married exactly 5 years ago on Easter-Saturday, and this year’s anniversary was on Easter-Saturday. Truly, what are the odds? We took care of some things in the morning, visited MIL and BIL in the afternoon and then went for dinner and movies. It was fantastic! I had wild boar and Spätzle – yum! A meat baby didn’t seem to mind at all 🙂

On Sunday we met friends at the Pax East gaming convention. The convention was absolutely amazing. If you’re a gamer, whether you play PC games, console games, handheld, or board games, you really got to go to this convention some day. It’s definitely an experience I do not regret to have made. We bought two board games there, got some cool stuff for free, I won a couple of things, and we saw some neat stuff– from dungeon and dragons gigantic figures to a preview of the next NWN game coming soon (uuuunfortunately MMO – I won’t go into that lol). We got to play D&D pen and paper version for two hours – that was interesting, and baby didn’t mind the burger and french fries for lunch haha! I haven’t gotten the photos off the camera yet – I will add them later on.

Pregnancy Symptoms:

Weight gain: Well, there was a lot of food on the weekend, but that didn’t really change much in my body weight! Baby must be actively burning my calories haha. During the past week my weight bounced around between 146 and 150 pounds. I’d say I’ve gained 2-3 pounds average in the first trimester. Not bad!

Frequent urination: This is beginning to drive me absolutely nuts. No, it’s not the having to go at night – that’s fine, I can handle that. I think, as baby is moving up slowly, it is pressing on my bladder. I go to the bathroom, feeling absolutely full, I urinate only a little bit, and the moment I get up, I feel like I need to go again! (yet when I lay down the feeling/urge subsides a little). It’s frustrating. I fear I’m “training” my bladder, giving it false “muscle memory” (for lack of better words), to make my body need to go when it’s not even half full. I’m trying to just sit it out longer, so I won’t give my bladder that wrong muscle memory. I’d imagine that would stay with me for a long time, if I don’t.

Morning sickness: Still going on. I wish I could say it’s gotten less, but it really hasn’t. Of course, as was the case with the trip to the Higgins Armory Museum, the morning of the Pax East convention I woke up with morning sickness. I don’t normally wake up feeling m/s. I guess baby must really be excited when he/she is about to go on a long trip…. O.o I can’t explain it any other way haha!

Other than that I really haven’t had much. My breasts are still hyper-sensitive, I get some tenderness in my lower abdomen from time to time, haven’t really felt heartburn that much this week. I feel the backpain only when I lay on my back for too long. I imagine I won’t be able to lay on my back at all anymore soon. So… that’s it, that’s all.

So, I’m twelve weeks… and I wonder, what about my progesterone? My head knows I can stop taking it now, because the placenta should have already taken over production, but my heart is overwriting my brain, saying whhhhhatttt if …. something goes wrong without the progesterone supps?! Yep, I’m currently driving myself nuts with this. I’ll talk with my midwife about it. Hopefully I can shed that fear soon. Again: I miss the naivety I had when I first started TTC last September, and when I first got pregnant last October. Now I know, consciously know, and it’s making me absolutely paranoid!

11 weeks

This past week has been rather uneventful regarding our little bean. I’ve mostly been busy studying for a test tomorrow for my Arthurian Legend class. Our baby helped – by not making me super-tired haha!

Last Friday our class has been on a really awesome trip. Bean was so excited, too: when I woke up, I woke up with morning sickness that day. (I don’t normally wake up feeling m/s). DH said to me that morning: Our bean is going on his or her first museum trip, and I can’t be there. Awwww, that was so cute.

So we went to the Higgins Armory Museum in Worcester, MA. It was amazing! If you haven’t gone there before, go – or you’ll really miss out. It is the largest medieval armor/weapon collection in the US. Our professor said, a larger one can only be found in Europe.

First we saw a short video clip about fighting style back in those days. It was interesting. What we see in the movies is definitely not quite how they used to fight. Then we had a presentation of weapons and armor, where we got to try them out (I wielded -among other things- a lance or spear -not sure which it was-, a crossbow, and what I believe was a claymore), and then we got a tour of the museum. After the tour we went to the “hands on” floor, where we were able to try on a breastplate (wow that thing was heavy!), various helmets, gloves and more. Then we visited the gift shop and I purchased a long sword there! Oh my god, it’s so awesome. On the sheath it says: Excalibur King Arthur. It has some kind of runes engraved on the blade. It’s huge and heavy. How could I live all these years with a passion like that and never own a sword before?! I’ll add various pictures at the end.

Here are this weeks preggo symptoms:

Morning sickness: oh yes, that’s still quite present. It comes and goes throughout the whole day. Used to be mostly in the afternoon, but now – even though still dominant in the afternoon – I feel it more throughout the day as well.

Hunger: Gosh, I can just eat and eat and eat endlessly. I ate all day on our trip, and when we got back around 4:30 pm, I was starving! I often wake up in the morning and feel so hungry it almost makes me sick.

Heartburn: This is getting its own category today, because I’ve been experiencing it more often recently, about 3-4 times in the past week.

Frequent urination: This is killing me! Sunday night I needed to go like four times. I was really tired on Monday. The average is now 2-3 times a night. Throughout the day it’s not that bad. I get flashes. In other words, either I don’t need to frequently go, or there are like 2-3 hours where I have to go like every 20 min. That usually seems to happen around 11am-12pm or around the afternoon like 2-5, which makes sense – it’s the times after I’ve drunk the most water.

Cramps: Some tenderness here and there, not much, not painful.

Backpain: I now notice it mostly when I lie on my back for too long, and it’s not very strong either. Other than that, it’s mostly gone away.

Ligament pain: I haven’t been feeling ligament pain very much this week – that’s a nice break.

Weight gain: This week my weight has been pretty steady in the 147 pounds range. I once had something around 146, and one at 148. I’d say at this point I’ve gained an average of 2 pounds so far.

Well, I think that’s it…

Enjoy the pictures (click to enlarge):

Excuse the bad quality on the two collages. I had to play around a bit, and I think I lost some quality doing that. If anyone knows a better way, please let me know 🙂 …. also, I’m sorry for the bad arrangement of the images. wordpress really gave me a hard time 😦

Knight with dog


Wielding a Crossbow

That one was awesome!

This thing must have weighed like 40 pounds...

What a knight! 😀

From the inside the museum looked like a castle. On the outside it was all glass and metal construction. Amazing!


Now all I need is a nice armor 🙂


What a beautiful sword.
Yea, it was too heavy to hold it all this time, so I had to rest it on my knee haha